Metallica Is Slipping

Metallica is releasing a new album this week, their first new material in a long time. Fans have already reportedly reserved an astonishing 1.5 million copies of the album. Unfortunately, I have a feeling they are going to be sorely disappointed in this cd.

I didn't get into Metallica right away when they made it big. The music was so hard that it took me a few years to really appreciate it for what it was worth. The first Metallica album I purchased was And Justice For All, and I bought the black album, and Load and Reload. Although others thought they sold out after "And Justice For All", I thought they did a good job of moving into a more mainstream musical approach. I have also intended on purchasing the albums from before And Justice For All.

I was driving around in my work truck the other day and the morning guys on local station 93.3 KRTZ (they are a couple of complete douchebags, but I won't go into that) were all excited because they had the new single from the upcoming Metallica album and they were going to play it. I was intrigued myself, looking forward to hearing what they were going to sound like, because all indications pointed to a return to harder metal like they used to play.

The song is terrible immediately. The drums sound like Lars is on speed or some other amphetamine of some sort, just hammering away on them with no real purpose at all, James Hetfield is ranting away out of sync also, and the guitar is just plain uncoordinated at best. I can only pray that the rest of this album has more substance and better songs, or this is going to be one of the most astonishingly huge musical failures of all time, regardless of how many they sell the first few days. They won't sell much more once people start realizing how terrible it really is.

The only reason the song is even being played by radio stations everywhere is because of the name Metallica itself, which is really sad. If St. Anger had been released by a no name band, every radio station in the nation would have laughed hysterically and never have played it, but oh, because it's METALLICA, they feel they have to play it, and not only that, retards like the morning guys on 93.3 actually talk about how great the song is and keep a straight face about it, to me that is just absurd. If they weren't being paid big bucks by Elektra to promote the song no one on earth would play it. It's THAT bad.

Pacifists Need Pacifiers

I'm sick of turning on the television or opening up the newspaper and seeing ignorant anti-war people spouting off their empty heads and loud mouths about how 'evil' America is for going after Iraq, and about how we terrible war is and that there is no excuse for fighting ever...

There is a set of instructions on how to handle a pacifist, it's really a simple procedure to help a pacifist change their ignorant ways:

First off, ask the person what they think about the war in Iraq, to be sure that this person is indeed a pacifist.

The person should answer with something like the following "War under any circumstances is bad, there are always better ways to handle any situations than to respond with violence".

At this point, punch the person in the nose, as hard as you can. If the person tries to fight back, hold up your hands and remind them that responding to your assault with aggression is bad, and that, as he/she had said before, there are better ways to handle this situation than fighting back. The person will say something like "Yes, that is right, fighting back is..." cut them off by punching them in the face as hard as you can again. If the person does not fight back after the first punch, then just punch them again right away.

Repeat the before mentioned steps until the person realizes that, yes, sometimes it is necessary to fight back to protect oneself

Dumping Is BAD!!!

I was on a route out of Lincoln earlier today while working and I saw this written on a billboard... "Dumping Is BAD!!!" and there was a sheep on the billboard, and a pile of something beside the sheep in a field, like along a road or something. This has to be one of the stranger billboards I have ever seen in my life (although, every one of them in South Dakota on the interstate going west probably is wierder, but we won't go there, it's South Dakota, enough said).

I got to thinking, what in the world is someone doing dumping a perfectly good sheep??? I mean, the sheep in the picture on the billboard was healthy, he was looking unhappily at some pile of stuff, perhaps someone dumped him too close to some garbage? I really don't know...

I wondered perhaps, if this were a play on words, such as, "Dumping Is Baaaaaaaaaad", like a sheep going "baaaaaaahhhhh". Certainly in this day and age we don't still have problems with rogue sheep running around leaving piles of litter in the wilderness? You have to really hate it when sheep get all wild in this day and age and start dumping their McDonald's wrappers out of the car and leaving messes around.

But, I am sure I actually figured out what the billboard meant, because obviously, if you think about sheep dumping, it probably means that there are wild sheep in the city of Lincoln crapping on people's lawns. Nobody wants that going on, that is just terrible. Of course, someone should have thought of one thing before they put up the billboard...

MOST SHEEP CANNOT READ!!!

DUH, I swear, don't people think before they act? What a waste of money, only the smartest of sheep can read, and I wouldn't think they are the ones out crapping around, well, unless they are drunk, or high, but then, sheep that are doing drugs aren't all that smart, now are they?

Well, let's just hope that someone can get ot the bottom of all this sheep dumping going on.