Listen Here You Dog Faced Pony Soldiers!
Saturday, September 24, 2005
This Is Wolfpack 3, Repeat Last Transmission, Over
If you’ve:
Ever worn dark colored pants with a long sleeve button up dark colored shirt, on a 97 degree day…
Called your dark colored, long sleeved shirt a ‘blouse’…
Taken off your dark colored pants and shirt, so soaked with sweat and dirt and sand that they could stand up in the corner all by themselves…
Put that same clothing, dirty and stinky as hell, back on your body the next morning…
Divided the number of days you will be in the field by the number of clean socks, underwear, and shirts you have to come up with how many days in a row to wear each…
Slept in a sleeping bag, even though you had a mattress…
Eaten Chili-Mac out of a pouch…
Screamed with joy at finding the pinnacle of culinary delight in your lunch bag, the Lemon Pound Cake…
Yelled a progressive stream of 4 letter vulgarities at a 175 meter target that you have been shooting at all night that will NOT go down…
Uttered the phrase “18 days and a wakeup!!!”…
Eaten a meal with chicken in it for more than 14 days in a row…
Spent more than an hour digging sand out of your ears, hair, and ass crack…
Ever done 35 or more ‘side straddle hops’, 4 count, in a row…
Done a stretch called ‘the hamstring stretch standing’, with it’s horrible use of grammar…
Had to recite your social security number more than 40 times in one day…
Fallen asleep while riding in the back of a loud, 120 degree, bouncing, dirty, armored personnel carrier as it careens across the desert…
Gotten hit in the face with a Dragon anti-tank missile launching system that broke away from it’s mount, as you slept, inside of the armored personnel carrier careening across the desert…
Done pushups to get mail…
Hidden an apple in your ‘cargo pocket’…
Referred to baby powder as ‘my best friend’…
Considered baby wipes as ‘a shower in a box’…
Spent time in the ‘gas chamber’…
Seen the statement “SP from the AA at 22:00 and meet at the FOB for Co. PT and CTT to follow” and actually know what it means…
Gone to church to get away from other activities on a Sunday…
Then you are probably a current or former member of the military. I’m certain there are many other things that we military people have done that other military personnel would recognize, feel free to comment on it.
Current Lyrical Ramblings
Once we were standing still in time
Chasing the fantasies that filled our minds
You knew i loved you, but my spirit was free
Laughing at the question that you once ask me
Do You Know, Where You’re Going To – Diana Ross
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1 comment:
You know you have a son and/or daughter in the military if:
1. You spent at least a half hour online looking up information on camel spiders.
2. You spend an hour looking up information about why your son or daughter refused to take the anthrax vaccination.
3. The people on at the post office know you and have boxes and customs forms waiting for you as you walk in the door.
4. You actually thought bootcamp was tough at some point.
5. You're almost sure what your son or daughter is talking about when and if they call you.
6. You have an Acronym Finder bookmarked on your computer.
7. You spend even more time on the internet than you did while your son or daughter was in bootcamp.
8. You find yourself asking, "Where's the Training Matrix?" for MCT, SOI and MOS.
9. You tear up whenever you hear or read anything remotely patriotic.
10. You know the difference between Private, Private First Class, Lance Corporal, and Corporal and what an NCO is. And you know what and E3 is and an E6.
11. You start sounding like Scarlett in Gone With the Wind. "I can't think about that right now. If I do, I'll go crazy. I'll think about that tomorrow."
12. The word "deployment" has you running to the liquor store.
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